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Once again, I need to clarify that I am Jaymes mother. . . so my post isn't very objective.

However I work with teen mothers, I run a shelter for parenting and pregnant teens, so I feel I can answer with a fair amount of experience.

Almost all of the teens who become pregnant are victims of trauma. Statistically they are more likely to be victims of sexual abuse, they almost always have been either homeless, in foster care or living with relatives. They have layers of issues with addictions, abandonment, poverty and more. These girls have usually been taught from an early age that thier body is for others use, and the concept of birth control and/or just saying no to sex is something that is never taught to them.

The middle class teenage girl who goes too far with her boyfriend, gets pregnant and has a baby is not the normal teen pregnancy.

Second point: I didn't hear either girl complaining about missing teenage years. They were asked and both answered that sometimes they miss it, but that being a parent is a reward in and of itself.

As for Jayme, it may interest you to know a few facts. . . . She is an award winning flutist, who has performed in weddings, at the grand opening of a library, in San Diego and Seattle. She was a very strong student who graduated right on time. She reads avidly, is enrolled in college (With her boyfriend/babys father) and plans on getting her MBA.

Also. . . she worked until she was 6 months pregnant and put on bed rest. She works now, the babys father has always worked 2-3 jobs to take care of Gabriel.

She has private insurance, so no, your taxes aren't paying for anything.

I understand that isn't the norm but I also know that its so quick and easy to judge somebody then it is to actually jump in and be part of the solution. Go work with teen parents, volunteer to be a mentor to a young father, drive kids in foster care to appointments, learn about who these kids truly are. Your eyes may be opened

posted 4 years, 9 months ago
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I wanted to answer the question of birth control discussion with the teen moms. I can say that we did have that conversation many times. I was going to force her onto birth control at one point but she said that she would talk to me before she decided to have sex. I have always talked very openly with her about sexuality.

She did mention that it was time to get on birth control, and we talked about it, but it was less then two weeks later she found out she was pregnant. I should have been more pro-active, I should have done alot of things. However, those shoulds can't change anything now.

For those interested, I kept a blog of her entire pregnancy and the ups and downs the two of us (and the babys father) endured. You can find it at www.mybabysbaby.blogspot.com

posted 4 years, 9 months ago
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