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There are a lot of grey areas between Kicking up Your Heels Child Free, or Child Free by Conscious, and Heart Broken Infertile. I'm glad that people are starting to talk about this. 

I consider myself childless or child free, depending on the day, whether or not someone has turned their back on me for answering "No" to the ubiquitous question, "Do you have children?"

 

I don't, because of circumstances -- which includes root family situation (coming from a family that over-reproduced, which gave me scarce nurturing and financial/educational resources) -- my own choice of partner, a health situation that affected my money situation/quality of life.

 

Because I grew up with two very wonderful childfree/less role model aunts, I never thought this was going to be the end of the world. The private loss is something I can deal with -- but being publicly hounded, as well as alienated from my peers -- that's honestly something that I, as a child of the sixties/seventies -- didn't expect. I thought I'd be an adult in a brave new world where nuclear families weren't the only way, and people would be open minded enough discard their petty prejudices.

Some days I feel childfree -- but often it's society that makes me feel childless. I think the fertility frenzy of the past ten or fifteen years has made it more difficult to live a life without parenting. There's a lot of zealousness around this issue on both sides. 

-Christina Gombar

posted 3 years, 7 months ago
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