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A common question is, “does the recession make
domestic violence more prevalent?” The answer is that during
a recession when people are out of work they often spend
more time at home. A batterer who is home has more time
to coerce, threaten and assault his victim. For a victim it
is harder to leave the relationship during a recession
because leaving may mean quitting her job and/or losing
the financial security that comes along with staying with
the batterer.

Very few people who are out-of-work or losing their home even consider taking someone else’s life. Violence is a choice. Batterers believe that they have the right to control someone else, including the ultimate right to control whether that person lives or dies.

What can you do, if you know someone in an abusive
relationship? Your first instinct may be to tell her to “get
out yesterday.” But wait. Leaving is the most dangerous
time. The batterer feels thwarted in his entitlement for
control, so he is likely to escalate and become even more
violent. He is probably threatening to hurt her, the children,
family members, friends, co-workers. He’s proven he will
carry out his threats. She believes she is protecting all
those people by staying.

Leaving an abusive relationship is not an event, it is a
process. It can sometimes be a long process. How to stay
safe needs to be very carefully thought out. Even if you
would not make the same choices that she does, give her
your support. She is in the best position to make decisions
for herself and her children.

posted 2 years, 4 months ago
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